Category: Fred Smith

  • Top Five Things To Do When You Have A Fever

    This past Friday I came down with some weird bug that gave me a bad sore throat and a fever around 100-101. As a consequence, I’ve had absolutely nothing to do but lay around for the past three days. As a consequence of that, I came up with the top 5 things to do when you’re laying around with a fever. Are you excited? I know I am.

    5. Listen to Podcasts. Listening to a podcast is an easy way to keep yourself from complete boredom. I recommend 1up Radio.

    4. Demand more cowbell.

    3. Play Noiz2sa and rRootage on the iPhone or iPod Touch. These games can’t hold up very well under normal circumstancs, but they take on a whole new aspect when your body is doing its best to cook your brain in your skull.

    2. Pop some pills. Need I say more?

    1. Post on Hijinks. Lucid brain activity is overrated when it comes to posting on this site. Heck, the most entertaining stuff we say is born out of sleep deprivation and high amounts of caffiene. Posting with a fever is the next logical step. Granted, judging from the quality if this post one might have reason to disagree with me.

  • Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII. DMW Explained.

    Crisis Core has garnered much criticism for the largely unexplained and thoroughly random Digital Mind Wave (DMW) system that drives all of the character progression in the game. Final Fantasy VII certainly had its shortcomings when it came to combat and the materia system, but replacing experience points with a slot machine probably wasn’t the most intuitive approach. Anyway, the purpose of this post is to explain it to the best of my understanding and hopefully make things a little clearer for those who are curious.

    Hit the jump for the complete breakdown. (more…)

  • This Week in Updates: iDope tries, fails, and fails some more.

    Yay, another weekly feature! Since the dev scene on the iPhone and Touch is constantly updating their projects (that is to say, evolving), we’d be remiss if we didn’t continue to cover the games and applications we review. Since we only have a few reviews up right now, this week is going to be pretty short (but memorable!).

    iDope (v0.3.3)

    In an obvious response to our less then stellar review, a new version of iDope was released this week. Offering at least two new features, this update is sure to make the game last at least 5 minutes longer.

    All uncalled for harshness aside, here’s the changes we noticed:

    Limit on carrying capacity.
    Where as before you could carry any number of drugs in your jacket (737928 units of LSD? That’s a freakin’ huge jacket!), 0.3.3 imposes a 100 unit limit on the drugs you can carry. This is a great idea, but there’s one small problem. It doesn’t work. Sure, when you press the “Buy All” button the dialog box tells you you’re buying 100 units, but when you go back to your Jacket you will have bought the maximum amount that your money could buy. One has to wonder if any of these things are actually tested before they’re put up for download.

    Jacket Store.
    With the attempted limit on carrying capacity, you can now buy expanded bag space at the Jacket Shop. Choose from Pockets (+50), Minimal (+100), Bulk (+250), and Professional (+500). Once you start buying more slots the prices of the additions scale up. Of course, none of that matters since you can still buy unlimited units of drugs. Nice try.

    Subways are dangerous!
    To add to the authentic atmosphere of New York, you can now be mugged in the subway. I’m not sure why I’m in the subway when I’m traveling everywhere via airport, but that obviously doesn’t matter. Mugging amounts to a small amount of cash and a medium to large amount of health being taken away from you.

    Hospital and health regen.
    The local hospital as taken lessons from the new jacket store, and healing yourself scales up every time you buy their services. To offset the rising healthcare prices, you’ll now automatically regain 5 health every time you travel to a new location.

    That’s all for this Week in Updates. Stayed tuned for more (and hopefully better) updates next week!

  • Deep Thoughts about Pac-Man.

    I don’t condone the language, but this IM conversation is hi-LAIR-ious. Owen Good is a weekend editor on Kotaku, and as it turns out, he and his brother have some interesting views on the subject of the bowel movements of Pac-Man. No, I’m not kidding.

    That picture is a small representation of the profound thoughts contained in this article. If you can stomach some detailed bathroom humor and a little profanity, click the link.

    Two Brothers Meditating Upon Questions of Pac-Man

  • A Sad Truth

    World of Warcraft is a lot of things to a lot of people. To some, it is a break from the monotony of their day job. To others, its a way of life.
    Scott Kurtz sums it up very well.

    Ding - 20

    Ding!