Hijinks Inc.

Author: Fred Smith

  • This Week in Updates: iDope tries, fails, and fails some more.

    Yay, another weekly feature! Since the dev scene on the iPhone and Touch is constantly updating their projects (that is to say, evolving), we’d be remiss if we didn’t continue to cover the games and applications we review. Since we only have a few reviews up right now, this week is going to be pretty short (but memorable!).

    iDope (v0.3.3)

    In an obvious response to our less then stellar review, a new version of iDope was released this week. Offering at least two new features, this update is sure to make the game last at least 5 minutes longer.

    All uncalled for harshness aside, here’s the changes we noticed:

    Limit on carrying capacity.
    Where as before you could carry any number of drugs in your jacket (737928 units of LSD? That’s a freakin’ huge jacket!), 0.3.3 imposes a 100 unit limit on the drugs you can carry. This is a great idea, but there’s one small problem. It doesn’t work. Sure, when you press the “Buy All” button the dialog box tells you you’re buying 100 units, but when you go back to your Jacket you will have bought the maximum amount that your money could buy. One has to wonder if any of these things are actually tested before they’re put up for download.

    Jacket Store.
    With the attempted limit on carrying capacity, you can now buy expanded bag space at the Jacket Shop. Choose from Pockets (+50), Minimal (+100), Bulk (+250), and Professional (+500). Once you start buying more slots the prices of the additions scale up. Of course, none of that matters since you can still buy unlimited units of drugs. Nice try.

    Subways are dangerous!
    To add to the authentic atmosphere of New York, you can now be mugged in the subway. I’m not sure why I’m in the subway when I’m traveling everywhere via airport, but that obviously doesn’t matter. Mugging amounts to a small amount of cash and a medium to large amount of health being taken away from you.

    Hospital and health regen.
    The local hospital as taken lessons from the new jacket store, and healing yourself scales up every time you buy their services. To offset the rising healthcare prices, you’ll now automatically regain 5 health every time you travel to a new location.

    That’s all for this Week in Updates. Stayed tuned for more (and hopefully better) updates next week!

  • Deep Thoughts about Pac-Man.

    I don’t condone the language, but this IM conversation is hi-LAIR-ious. Owen Good is a weekend editor on Kotaku, and as it turns out, he and his brother have some interesting views on the subject of the bowel movements of Pac-Man. No, I’m not kidding.

    That picture is a small representation of the profound thoughts contained in this article. If you can stomach some detailed bathroom humor and a little profanity, click the link.

    Two Brothers Meditating Upon Questions of Pac-Man

  • A Sad Truth

    World of Warcraft is a lot of things to a lot of people. To some, it is a break from the monotony of their day job. To others, its a way of life.
    Scott Kurtz sums it up very well.

    Ding - 20

    Ding!

  • What I’m Playing: Kratos Edition

    There’s something very satisfying about playing God of War. Mostly because Kratos never does anything in a way that normal people would. He doesn’t open doors, he kicks them open, heaves them upward, or smashes though them. He doesn’t just open a chest, he strains for a couple seconds and then rips the lid off. And he doesn’t just kill his enemies, he slashes, pulverizes, rips, and otherwise destroys them in an impressive show of fire and blood. Call it character development through animation. Whatever it is, it’s a whole heckuva lot of fun to play.

    Nintendo DS

    Super Mario 64 DS. I got the game in the mail on Tuesday, and its shoved Animal Crossing aside as the game I leave in the DS when I take it to work. I never played Super Mario 64 in any depth (beyond a few minutes playing it at Wal-Mart and Best Buy when the 64 launched), so this game has been a plesent change from my normal gaming fair. I haven’t put much time into yet–I’m sitting at 7 stars–but it’s a great game to pick up and play during downtime at work.
    PSP

    Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII. I’m still working through the game on hard, but playtime has almost ground to a halt since God of War came in the mail. If I’m remember my first play through correctly, I’m a little over a third through the game.

    God of War: Chains of Olympus. I got the game Wednesday and I beat the game on Hero (Normal) mode in a little over 5 hours. Despite parts of greek mythology that I wish wern’t quite so authentic (the gods and goddesses don’t feel the need to wear a lot of clothes…weird Greek people) this is giving Crisis Core a serious run for its money for the best PSP game in the mind of Fred. After I beat it on Hero mode I gave God mode (two steps above Hero mode)) a shot just to see what the difference was and holy crap, I’m not nearly as good at this game as I thought I was.

    WoW Logo

    World of Warcraft. I’ve logged on a grand total of twice this week, once to check the auction house, and once to play with my girlfriend. I really can’t make myself care about playing Zian anymore, mostly because why I enjoy playing him is the raid content and I really don’t want to commit myself to WoW that much again.
    Anyhow, my girlfriend and I are playing a mage and a paladin respectively. I already had a level 36 pally alt on Dark Iron, but I needed a class that could keep a mage alive and the paladin was the best choice out of the Blood Elf racial choices. We’re at level 10, and still finishing the quests around Silvermoon City before we head down to the Ghostlands.

  • Hijinks Reviews: Pool.

    Pros: Good control scheme, great execution of an age old game.
    Cons: No real multiplayer support, physics engine shows some weakness.

    Platform: iPod Touch and iPhone.

    Developer: Adalat Nasibov (www.adikus.com)

    Version Reviewed: 1.2

    Pool is a game dating back to the middle ages. Originally it was played almost exclusively by nobility, but by the 1800s it was a premier past time in taverns and saloons across the world. So, how does a 500 year old game translate to the touch screen? Turns out, pretty dang well. Full review and screens after the jump. (more…)